


Salvation

by Lothiriel84



Category: The Mentalist
Genre: Alternate Universe, Drama, F/M, Friends With Benefits, Hurt/Comfort, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-03
Updated: 2013-04-03
Packaged: 2017-12-07 08:55:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/746652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lothiriel84/pseuds/Lothiriel84
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This has never been about love anyway.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Salvation

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Paint It Red April 2013 Monthly Challenge - prompt: "Save Me" by Bo Bruce.

_You were never ready to save me_

 

The first time they fall in bed together they're both drunk. In the morning she's sorry, but he's not.

He spends the rest of the day in the company of a terrible hangover, musing on the fact this is his first time ever since his wife, and he can't even remember it properly.

The guilt stays the same, but he's used to that by now. It's the only constant in his life nowadays, and in some twisted way it's a relief that he's still able to feel anything at all.

xxx

He can never tell when it's going to happen. It can take days or months, even years maybe. He just knows that loneliness will grow unbearable at some point, and he will turn to her again.

In the darkness he can easily pretend it's someone else's body that is moving in time with his own, panting and sweating until he stifles a cry of release.

She always takes a shower after they're done, as if she feels dirty for cheating on the memory of a dead woman. They never talk as she slips out of his room at the first crack of dawn.

xxx

Sometimes he's the one trying to comfort her. After she fails the poly on the McTeer murder. The night before Bosco's funeral. Whenever a case takes its toll on her for whatever reason.

He's fairly rough on those occasions, because he knows that's exactly what she needs.

Angry tears trickle down her cheeks until she shudders around him and falls over his chest. In the morning she wears a turtleneck sweater to work in order to hide the bruises where he's sunk his teeth in the pale skin of her neck.

xxx

"I've slept with Walter the other night."

"I know."

"So what?"

"I don't care."

He pushes her back onto the bed and starts unbuttoning her blouse. This has never been about love anyway, he has no reason to feel jealous about her one-night stands.

They're just two friends helping each other through a hard patch. He knows she'd deserve a shot at a proper relationship, he's just too selfish to nudge her in the right direction.

Besides, Mashburn definitely isn't the right man for her. He wonders what the arrogant playboy would think if he could see them right now, and his lips curl in a wry smirk.

xxx

Sophie Miller used to touch him when he was at the hospital. She said it was for his sake, he's pretty sure she started to believe her own lie at some point.

Out of the hospital he touched himself too, but that was before he hooked up with Lisbon. Her hand always feels so good on him, it wouldn't have been the same with Erica or Kristina.

(He doesn't remember the night he's probably spent with Tamara, so she just doesn't count.)

It's at times like this that he's finally able to switch off his brain, if only for a short while.

xxx

"How was Lorelei in bed?"

"Come again?"

"You heard me."

"Good. You're far much better though."

She shifts her hips, and his hands wrap around her waist in order to guide her movements.

In another life, he could have fallen for Teresa Lisbon. They would get married, have a couple of kids and live in a house with the white picket fence.

This is no romantic movie though, and Red John is the only living person he thinks about day and night. There will be no happy ending for the two of them, not even once his revenge will be accomplished at long last.


End file.
